Yet the Roses Still Bloom...

 

“If life transcends death

Then I will seek for you there

If not, then there too”

― James S.A. Corey

Winter roses in the local tiny botanical garden

Hello, Bloggie Frens. I have missed you.

Life trundles on, not always on the path we wanted or made, but it goes on, if we're lucky.

After a very bad almost two years, my husband passed away August 14th. It was needless. Even at 88, he still had years left, I felt. But in some parts of the country, it is very, very hard to get adequate care. And it is easy to get very bad care. We do not have good doctors, or facilities. Our city turned out not to have a single surgeon capable of doing an amputation. There weren't enough nurses to open the floors of the hospital, so weeks were spent in the hallways of the ERs. And the giant border city near us -- the same. When people talk about the "hair raising up" on the back of their necks when danger appears -- it literally can happen. It happened every time I went into a hospital that looked like some kind of war zone, to a trashed out ward. It's been like living in a third-world country. We border Juarez here; I cannot describe the alien landscape properly. It's been awful. And then he died.

I can't really go into it, other than to say it was a bad end and I am still in shock. I always had sympathy for the widowed; but until you live it -- and I hope you don't have to, through some miracle -- you don't realize how awful it truly is. I am rudderless; my anchor is gone. 

"Put one foot in front of the other..." and "Keep on keepin' on." My mantras for hard times. I have a job I liked, and I still go in and robotically do what I'm supposed to do. I feed the pets, I throw the ball, I pull the feather on a string. I pay the bills -- late, because I am still confused and in shock. It is, in the words of another author, "The land of beginning again." I don't like this land.

During the past almost two years, I wanted to post, to follow along with my fellow Bloggers. We are a dying breed. Every time I would prep a post, each time I went to a blog to read, my husband's health would take a dramatic turn. It happened again and again, until I was afraid to go online at all. I know it wasn't actually connected, but I got so spooked. I was so afraid, and I was grasping at straws of what is "lucky" and what might be "unlucky." 

That's bad, I know it. That's the opposite of faith, but my faith took a big dent. It's like seeing someone I loved dying by inches zoomed out my thought about the Universe. Sometimes when driving to the hospital I would yell out to God, "WHERE ARE YOU?" 

The earth looked smaller and smaller in my mind, and disappeared, and it felt more cold and alone than I can properly express. The WWII veterans passing, the knowledge of that time, the old folks who lived through the Depression, those of the Vietnamese War -- somehow this has gotten mixed up with my personal grief. The passing of older generations, the new culture seeming so strange to me -- It's all mixed.

I just hold a hope that you are all still okay, all still there, all still treading this earth. All safe.

For 2024, that's my wish, bloggie frens. A safe and good year ahead for each of you. My wizened heart and my hermit's soul still have love for those I have met along the way, so, love to you.

Holly

The Olde Dame

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Hippity Hoppity Hobbledy Happy Holy Week, and Some Easter Tags, Free!

 

Hello Bloggie Frens...

I haven't forgotten you, or my blog! Just overwhelmed and swamped, but making progress. Health, volunteer "job," finances, pets' health, hubby's health, and being stunned by the state of the world have set me back on my heels a bit. 

Today a hickory hiking stick arrived. It isn't very tall, but taller than a cane. I'm afraid I am going to be a bit of a spectacle now, using the stick. But I need it in order to be able to get around better. It's more useful than a cane to me, at this point. But, I do think I look odd, most probably. Well, too bad!

But I'm hopping in to say, or maybe hobbling in to say, "Have a wonderful Holy Week!"

Mayhap someone may need some free Easter tags. So, here some are! Similar to last year's, but a bit different.

Remember, use the LINK so it prints out the right size. It's stored on Google Drive, which is safe. We think.

Link: 2022 Free Easter Tags

Kind regards,

Holly, The Olde Dame (with a stick)

Put Your Tulips A Little Closer to the Phone

Right after I was bragging on a local Facebook gardening page that we've already entered spring and hot weather was ahead, the winds began anew and the forecast now is for freezing nighttime temps for the next week! 

The wind is so strong that a few tulips, despite being in the little courtyard, have had their petals stripped off! So now I wonder: Do I leave the rest and hope for the best, or get the scissors and make a bouquet?

I have been told never to mix daffadowndillies with other flowers, as their sap is toxic to them. So I may have two spring bouquets inside soon, one of the sweet nodding daffs, and one of the tulips. 

Such beauty here, and such a frightening and strange situation in Ukraine! I have felt unsure of Russia for a long while, and also of China. But I was surprised to see how suddenly we all are facing the possibility of an actual World War III. So, my friends, I am praying for us all, and wish for each of you a safe little life! I do not understand dictators and land-grabbers! Why don't they choose happiness instead of a vain attempt at earthly power?  

Kind regards,

Olde Dame Holly

Spring Zephyrs Have Arrived

I love all the old words so much! Zephyrs and daffadowndillies, gillyflowers and galoshes, gauds and glebes a-gleaming in the spring sunshine! An old use of the word "gauds" is for the "Our Father" beads of the Rosary, which are traditionally bigger or flashier than the "Hail Mary" beads, but my Granny also used that word for her costume jewelry. And we used the word "pretties," too, for such things.

The palo verdes have put forth their leaves, perhaps unwisely, and their trunks are greening up so much they look painted. Our spring winds have begun, and bring in dust storms. It starts about noon, after a calm morning, and blows until six or seven, with gusts up to 60 mph.

Now, here's a new word for me, learned only about a decade ago: Haboob, meaning a huge dust storm that bears down on a place. We just always said, "dust storm," even though that's not really specific enough to describe a towering cloud of dust that pushes into a clear area, and turns day to night almost instantly. We did not have a haboob yet this year, just the usual dust storms.

I ran into Walmart today to get some salad for our dinner, and couldn't resist going down the Easter aisles, where I found two decorations I could not resist. I don't know why black and white so suddenly appealed to me, but now I have added them to the mantel. They were reasonable at $1.98 each for the big polka-dot egg and a three-pack of carrots. 

The carrots were glued together, but easily broke apart. On the mantel, I also changed the usual berries in the old Mexican jug for navy blue berries. I think they will go all the way to autumn easily! Especially with many patriotic holidays before Hallowe'en. This is a sea-change for me, in terms of color. I look like death in navy blue, and always avoided it in any context. It makes my eyes look a dreadful split-pea green, like a llama's eyes right before it spits. But somehow the navy berries looked delightful!

Went to the thrift store to try to get some of the Chick Fil-A chicken they kindly donate on Saturdays, but all chicken was already gone. I did get a very large bag of their delightful biscuits, however! And I saw this cute basket for holding mail, all in tones of dusty pink, with a spray of millinery flowers on it. This is "Maiden Aunt Chic," I think. 

I finished two more cross-stitch charts, and one is in the process of being made into yet another pinkeep. The other one is already a pinkeep. Yet I am forever looking for a pin. I finished these too late for Valentine's for this year, but maybe they will sell next year.

I rarely venture out at night, but I took this photo of our little downtown on the way back from visiting a church. It looks late, but it wasn't. Night had just fallen. I love cutting through the downtown whenever I'm out, day or night!

Wishing you an early spring and fresh days as we head towards the Lenten season! 

Kind regards,

Holly, The Olde Dame

Happy Valentine's Day

If no one got you flowers...and sweets to the sweet...then these are for you!

Happy Valentine's Day

These were at a reception for couples at a special Anniversary Mass held last Saturday at our Cathedral. I was there to capture candid photos of the attendees and the Bishop.

Valentine's Day is a bit hard for me. I don't usually get anything on Valentine's from my spouse or ex...and they have never wanted anything from me, and never looked at any Valentine's cards or treats I bought. So, I am relieved when it's over and I can stop feeling anxious about it! I brought a bag of my rosaries into the church office and gave them out to the workers and other volunteers, and that was so fun because they graciously made it fun by their excitement! The best part of today!

I have a buffet-line tip for you! There was no place to rest a plate at the gathering for the special Mass, and the pretty paper plates were the s-l-i-p-p-e-r-y kind, so many treats were ending up on the floor. Solution: Use a cup, if they have the big kind! Layer the treats in like a trifle and put a fork in there, too! Fish the treats out as desired. Yes, my waistline will attest to the fact that I know all kinds of tips and tricks for foods!

Today is practically a spring day! Now, if it will just stay this way! My tulips are getting bigger and bigger.

Kind regards and hopes that you are having a good day,

Holly, The Olde Dame

Busy Needle, Still Mind

Picking up needle and thread and creating a design lets me go into a special place in my mind. In some ways, I fight guilt, as many think of it as an indulgence or a useless art. But anything that allows your soul to rest and your mind to think of beautiful things cannot be a waste of time! Sometimes, every stitch is a prayer. Other times, I don't know where my mind goes. It just wafts away on billows of memories. I actually have the sensation of moving through time, in both directions!

Nandina berries with ice during our cold snap

I love much about modern life, especially things like heartworm medicines for pets and the internet, but I miss that time is not given for handicrafts. I am glad that I have rescued pieces of lace and bits of quilts and other handmade goods from yesteryear. These things speak deeply to my heart. 

Here is a peek at my Valentine's Snowman. I'm sewing it into yet another "pinkeep" or "cabinet tuck" or "mini-pillow," whichever term you care to use. It will be finished by morning, because this is one of those doze-sew-read-doze kind of nights. 

We had a bit of snow here, mainly in the mountains, but we in the foothills got some, too. I gathered some of it because it's very good for houseplants. "Poor Man's Fertilizer," the old-time farmers called it. The ivy in the bathroom enjoyed it very much and is putting out leaves from the boost it gave.

I drove up to the true beginning of the mountains and got a few snapshots. Gosh, haven't heard that term in awhile. "Snapshots."

I have the mantel decorated for mid-winter. It is quite plain, but in person there are touches of red that are very cheery, including the little wooden mushroom to the left. In the fireplace, a Holy Candle always burns. I took an entire bag of candles to Mass on Candlemas (Feb. 2nd) to be blessed.

Some of the nandina berries I plucked before the snow and ice came.

I should probably dig out more Valentine's decor. 

I hope you are all well and well-content during these wintry days. Even our Florida blog friends got a shocking blast of cold air!

I am very slow to go around to the blogs, and I apologize. I love to read them and to pray for my bloggie frens, but am still a bit down. 

Kind regards,

Holly, the Olde Dame

Roses in Winter, Deux

Today I went to the little park, where the winter roses bloom, and I gathered three roses. There were only three blooming. I also saw a sprig of rose hips, and took that as well. 

There is a new statue outside at our Cathedral, a depiction of Our Lady as she appeared at Guadalupe. I put the roses in her hands and I knelt and just had no words, except to help me be strong for my little family. I love the new statue. 

But I have been given a great gift to feel as if I am looking at the actual Blessed Mother. The Virgen de Guadalupe is the best-known apparition Mary has made in the new world, so she is especially dear to us here. On Mary's hand in the photo above, do you see a bright spark of light? Mary was in shadow, with the sun behind her. That little spark has me wondering.

And now the spark has moved...and doubled...

I can always feel Mary's eyes on me in church. She always has such a loving gaze, a balm to the heart.

The faithful have gathered the pretty berries that fell around the statue and made a ring around her feet. I love the childlike faith here. I wish everyone lived where the churches are open every day, and a Mass (or sermon) is said each and every day at each church!

I hope your week is going well and that "Hump Day" finds you safe, content, and well, and if any of those things are missing, may they quickly find their way into your life.

Kind regards,

Holly, The Olde Dame

Sassed by Google!

The other day, my husband and I were sitting at the big farm table he built decades ago. I have a love/hate relationship with that table: I love how I can spread out crafts, foods, and sewing on it, but I dislike how very massive it is. We have a "great room" in this current house, and it sits in there, near the kitchen. But for the usual formal dining rooms of suburban homes of the 1960s and 1970s, it is too large. 

Anyhoo, we were sitting there, and as usual my phone was near me. We were chit-chatting about something, and suddenly the Google Girl Voice boomed out something about whatever it was we were talking about. I hadn't queued it up in any way, and I don't have the Google Assistant enabled, but there it was, talking and talking. 

I told my husband, "Gee, that Google is always listening. It's like a spy."

Oh boy! Suddenly the voice, with a sound of anger, said, "We are not always listening."

I about fell off the bench. I was shocked! The voice went on, something like this (I was so shocked I could barely attend to what it was saying):

"Google Assistant is activated only when initiated...blah blah blah...we do not listen...blah blah blah...privacy something privacy privacy something....blah blah...You can open the Google Something and delete any conversation at any time."

I yelled, "You just proved you are listening!" and then I am afraid I said a lot of bad words mixed in with the Prayer of St. Michael.

And in the snippiest tones, Google Girl Voice then said, "Do you want to delete this conversation?" and I said, "YES!"

I'm pretty suspicious as a person, but having an argument with the Google Artificial Intelligence (AI) Karen Bot really shook me up. I was SASSED by an invisible robot spy!

I have also been sassed by an AI on the phone. I called an office, only to be met with a huge number of menu options. Press this, press that, and I mumbled something rude, like "What dumb-butt programmed this?" and the phone shot back, "Why, thank you!" in the most sarcastic tones.

The local university campus has a lot of actual physical "bots" that hurry to the dorms and offices from the various food and toiletries vendors on and around campus. Students and staff can order lunch, hygiene items, and so forth, and off will go a bot, rolling along with the students on the pathways, seeming almost alive! But the campus bots are friendly and polite! They don't sass anyone and they stop if you need to go in front of them!

Before Christmas I got some video and photos of them, but I'm too old to keep up with their nimble wheels. There are two in the photo below, both to the right of the pole.

I needed some time with nature after the run-in with Google! I went to church and there were so many lovely bouquets in honor of the Saints and of the Epiphany. I took photos of some lovely pale roses, and some bright mixed bouquets. I don't know if it's because of our large Hispanic population, but the parish churches just burst with flowers. There are always armfuls of roses at the base of each statue of Mary outside, too.

I hope if you are having a cold or dreary day, that these will brighten it! 

Have you ever been sassed by an Artificial Intelligence entity?

Kind regards,

Olde Dame Holly

Get Ready for Twelfth Night

I first blogged about Twelfth Night in 2015. Here is the post, updated a bit.

Most of my little celebrations are just me and the pets. Back when my first husband was in graduate school, we had so many friends (I thought), and Twelfth Night was loads of fun, with loads of company. *sigh*

But don't let a lack of comrades stop your enjoyment of holidays or events! Enjoy them yourselves. Draw memories of good times to yourself, and enjoy. With COVID, we are having to learn new ways to celebrate.

For Twelfth Night, lay in a goodly supply of nuts to crack, especially walnuts, and make a batch of spiced cider or wassail.  If you have the money, get some little pots of ivy to place around the den, or get any houseplants, really. 

WHEN is Twelfth Night? It's the evening of January 5th, the eve of the Feast of the Epiphany on the 6th. The Epiphany marks the end of Christmas (in most churches) and is 12 days after Christmas ("the Twelfth Night"). The song "The Twelve Days of Christmas" harkens to Twelfth Night.

If you can, have a smorgasbord: Cheese, meats, crackers, boiled eggs, carrot sticks, dip, jams.

Where possible, have a fire built in your fireplace. Have it burning brightly once it's dark out. Twelfth Night is a LONG party - it goes to past midnight. If you have no fireplace, and you can SAFELY do so, have a bunch of candles lighted, preferably up high so no one is endangered. If you are having a bonfire, get it ready. If you have no access to actual fire, play one of the fireplace videos on your laptop!

During the evening, before the stroke of midnight, feed the old greenery, twigs, cinnamon sticks, etc. from Christmas into the fireplace or bonfire, while snacking and talking. If you have a bonfire, I'd suggest throwing it all on at one go, and getting back inside to get warm. If you are lucky enough to have some teens at your fest, they will probably be "firebugs" and love to keep going outside and throwing things onto the bonfire.

If you are inside and have access to the fireplace, it's fun to throw the things into the fire a bit at a time. My favorite thing to throw in is a pinecone. If I bought cinnamon cones before Christmas, I throw them, too, since the scent's gone.

If you have no access to a bonfire or hearth fire, just throw the old pine boughs and greenery out of the front door! I just have a few sprigs of juniper and yew left this year, and some berries from a nandina bush. 

Now, Twelfth Night is not for the faint of heart. It's a time for telling ghost tales and odd happenings. In olden days, so was Christmas Eve, don't you know. So let your tongue run freely as to strange sights and olde stories (I have a million such), and if the feeling moves you, tell some new tales that pop into your mind. The key is to tell tales of wondrous happenings without being gruesome or awful or non-Christian - kind of like the "Sleepy Hollow" story.

If you will be celebrating alone, as this Olde Dame must, watch an old movie or read a book of strange tales (like The Hobbit, Rip Van Winkle, or even an autobiography of long ago, such as A Schoolteacher in Old Alaska which has many strange happenings).

As midnight nears, continue to crack open the nuts and eat them, throwing the shells into the fire. Pop popcorn and salt it well for luck. Talk or think of the year ahead, and sing olde songs. Remember olde times and olde friends and don't let the fire or candles go out before midnight.

Now, remember the broom you bought a few days back? Well, get it ready. Get your OLD broom ready, too. At midnight, you are going to THROW that old broom out your back door, bristles first. That broom is now your "yard broom" and its indoor days are over. It took last year's regrets and errors with it. Out they went. Take your NEW broom and draw it thrice across the front door threshold, drawing in luck. 

If you have guests, give each a little bag or jar of salt (luck) and a bag of walnuts (representing gold nuggets) to take with them as they leave.

I often stay up most of the night, just dozing on the futon or in a recliner.

If you can't manage Twelfth Night, don't worry: CANDLEMAS is another very olde celebration. It has you taking down all decorations by February 1st, and runs much the same way as Twelfth Night, but with even more plants to be placed around in anticipation of spring.  

As you know, of course, Twelfth Night is just done in fun, and is merely a fanciful attempt to recreate some of the holidays of the very early Church.

Kind regards,

Holly, The Olde Dame  

 

"In the Bleak Midwinter," Some Light!

I love that song, "In the Bleak Midwinter."

Oh, it's not midwinter yet, but it can feel like it when the Christmas lights come down and all seems dark. Even though the days are getting longer, January and February can still feel gloomy, especially in climes where it is cloudy and cold.  

I am extremely sensitive to light, or rather the lack of it. But even in the sunny desert, the winter days can feel dark. So, I always have a "substitute Christmas tree" ready for when the real tree comes down. I used to have a tall birdhouse on a turned table leg, but during the last move it disappeared, and so I am using a little birdcage I have, and reusing some "rice lights" or "fairy lights" that run off a USB plug. 

It uses negligible energy so it's on all day right now. I have a glittered bird's nest in there because I cannot yet let go of all the sparkle of Christmas! At night it gives a wonderful glow.

 

Morgy relaxing by the new display.

I saw on another bloggie fren's post that she has electric candles in her house year 'round. I am going to try for that idea, too! I hope some of the thrift stores will have some when they reopen this coming week.

 
And I am already at it with Valentine's decor. Just a bit! You might recall these items from last year, too.

 
We had a day of rain yesterday, unusual here. And then that cold front that's sweeping across the nation came in, and when the clouds lifted, there was snow on the mountains. 

I drove hubby up to the foothills and took some photos. We couldn't get close because the road had a gate across it. It's usually open.

Driving up to the foothills caused me to miss Mass at the parish I prefer. But God had a plan; Father Alex at the big parish had a homily I really needed to hear. It was about letting yourself feel joy, feel appreciation, despite the sadness in this world. To not feel guilt when seeking out joy and beauty. It's not a seesaw, where if you have peace and joy on one side, the other side tips up and dumps more sadness on the world! Well, he said it much better than I can. He feels that any happiness you have can help you reach out to others and combat darkness. "While you are biting into a piece of cake, don't let it turn to dust in your mouth because you think of the hungry children. Enjoy the cake and think of ways to help the hungry, and do it."

Some lore:

"When snow flies, rain falls, you see a bird on the wing, or breath is visible the first 10 days of January, so too will especial fortune and hope mark the days of the coming year."

Twelfth Night is coming! I will put up my usual post about it this week, maybe tomorrow. Don't forget to buy a new corn broom, if you can! Brooms are rather prominent in a lot of old lore.

Practical lore: 

525,600 minutes in a year! How many can you spare to help others and treat yourself kindly? 

This year, if you want to do so, get an inexpensive "planner" and on each date, write the weather, and if you feel inclined, write something you thought, or that you did. You will be glad you did, at the end of next year!

FOR THE DISORGANIZED: Get a very large box, if you are a disorganized person such as I. Get one of those photocopy boxes. Into the box, throw everything you think you might need, paperwork-wise. Receipts, notes you jot down, mail that you received. Keep it all in that box, if it has no other designated place. I used to have to dig through it constantly, but now my skills have improved and I am just comforted by it and don't often have to go rustling through it for something important. The box idea has helped a lot of young folks out on their own for the first time.

Thank'ee for stopping by! Do you know any New Year lore? What's on your mind today?

Kind regards,
Holly, The Olde Dame

Step Right Up, Step Right Through

2022 in just a few days. Impossible!

Oh, do you remember that television special, Roger and Hammerstein's Cinderella, introducing Leslie Ann Warren? As a child, I would wait for it every year! I loved the song, "Impossible/It's Possible" especially! As a college student, I would see the Prince again, this time as spoiled and sneaky Alan Quartermaine in General Hospital! Impossible that it's over 40 years ago!

You can watch it free on YouTube, with ads! It's possible! Here's the link: Cinderella 1965 Musical 

Impossible that 2022 is here. And yet, it's possible that perhaps 2022 will see the end of this COVID and a turning to the light from what I feel has been a dark two-plus years.

These gates and doors in the old Village of Mesilla remind me that the door is opening to a fresh year! I think mankind enjoys the idea of a "clean slate" very much. And 2022 is a clean slate for one and all. 

 It is so sweet, how people paint on their homes in Mesilla and many places in the Southwest. In Tucson, many people painted designs on their windows, too.

And of course, doors remind me of a favorite Bible verse, Revelation 3:20: Behold, I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hear my voice, and open the door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him, and he with me.

Bloggie frens, have a wonderful Wednesday and every day!

Kind regards,

Holly, the Olde Dame